A Chat with Sheri Booker

Today I am pleased to welcome Sheri Booker to the Death Writer blog! Sheri and I both went to Goucher College.  (In case you were wondering, not everyone who goes through the MFA program at Goucher writes about death.)  Sheri's book,

Nine Years Under

, is about working at a funeral home as a young woman.  I look forward to reading it.

DW:  I read that you began working in the funeral industry at the age of 15, which I think is amazing. How did that happen?

SB:  I lost my great-great Aunt Mary to cancer. She lived with me and was my everything. The funeral director who buried her was a member of our church and close family friend. I needed closure and was very curious about what happened to Aunt Mary, so I accepted a position at the funeral home that handled her services. While most people run away from death, I ran towards it. What was supposed to be a simple summer job turned into nine years of living and learning through death. I know it will sound cliché but everything I learned about life, I learned through death.

DW:  Did you have experience with death prior to working in a funeral home?

SB:  No, just Aunt Mary. If she had not passed away, there was NO WAY I would have worked, stepped foot in, or even looked twice at a funeral home. 

DW:  What was your job title at the funeral home? 

SB:  I had so many different roles at the funeral home that I didn’t have a specific title. We were a small business and so you did a little of everything. I probably held every hat there, except embalming. Some days I was a receptionist, greeter, hearse driver on service, personal concierge. I’ve done hair, makeup, helped dress bodies, written obituaries.

DW:  What was your favorite aspect of this job? 

SB:  I worked with some amazing people and they made the work we did so much easier. I felt blessed to be able to service grieving people, especially since I had been on that side of death. I knew how important it was to be that voice of comfort on the phone when we received a death call or that smiling faces when they came to the funeral home to make arrangements.

DW:  Were your coworkers a support network for you when there was a particularly upsetting death that you all had to handle? Was there someone you could talk to? 

SB:  Yes, we were a family. There were no secrets between us. My boss, Mr. Wylie, was like a father to all of us and Ms. Angela, the office manager, kept everything together. We laughed a lot and we had to because we saw some really heartbreaking cases. Working there made us all stronger.

DW:  Did you learn anything about yourself during the writing process of this book? 

SB:  Absolutely. I happened to be one of the youngest people in Goucher’s MFA program and all of my peers kept telling me that I was too young to write memoir, that at the age of 23 I couldn’t possibly have one in me. But in my mind, I had stories for days and days, more than one book in me. Looking back, I’ve realized that they were right about me being too young to write a memoir. I didn’t have the distance and maturity that I needed to really delve in. I struggled through a few revisions because I just couldn’t come to terms with what had actually happened. I think when writing memoir you have to have the ability to be subjective.

DW:  Burial or cremation? 

SB:  It’s so interesting. For me personally, I’d like to be cremated. Of course I want to have a viewing and funeral but for my final disposition cremation all the way. For a long time cremation was taboo in the African-American community because it’s such an inexpensive service. Many people assumed that if you chose cremation you just didn’t have the money to bury someone. Now it’s more of a preference for families. 

DW:  Are you going on a book tour? 

SB:  Yes, I will be having events in Baltimore, DC, Philly, NYC and ATL this summer. Check out my website

www.sheribooker.com

and

www.nineyearsunder.com

 for more information.

WIP IT!

Today I am participating in a blog hop where writer peeps share their current Work in Progress or WIP.  You can read all about it here.

WIP It Title:  Death Becomes Us

Word Count: 87, 685 and it will probably be a wee bit longer.

Genre: Memoir

How long have I been working on it?  I started my research in January of 2009.

Elevator Pitch:  Death Becomes Us is a humorous quest narrative based on a personal fear.  Think Eat, Pray, Love, but Death, Dying and Grief.

Brief Synopsis:
    After an accidental call to a funeral home in my first month of grad school, I reluctantly embarked on a journey to explore death professions for my thesis. During my two years of research, I encountered an embalmer afraid of dying, a grieving EMT, an upbeat grief counselor, and a hopeful death row inmate.  My narrative arc follows me from avoidance and fear to eventual immersion and acceptance. Emotionally I went from grieving at a funeral for my cigarettes to crying over a dead man’s body just minutes after his execution.  Although I am not an expert on death, nor was I dying while writing this memoir, I realized the importance of surrendering to the idea of death to fully live the life we are given.  The result of this quirky trip is Death Becomes Us, a humorous and at times heartbreaking memoir about what happens when a socially anxious, middle-aged, woman attempts to investigate the last taboo of American culture. 

I would love a Beta Reader, especially if memoir is your thing.

Cheating Death?

If you watch or read the news, you probably heard that Angelina Jolie had a double mastectomy a few months back.  She didn't have breast cancer, but she found out through genetic testing that she carried a gene BRCA1, that increased the likelihood that she would have breast cancer at some point in her life.  Here is a link to Jolie's Op-Ed.

If we're lucky, we get to go to the doctor and have our annual exam where we are screened for breast cancer, ovarian cancer and our blood is usually drawn to check our cholesterol or thyroid levels.  I'm not going to say I look forward to these exams, but after I go through it, I'm glad I did.  It's one less thing to worry about and I feel like I'm being proactive about my health.

But, and there's always a but, I don't ever want to look into the crystal ball of genetic testing.  I view it this way, we're all going to die of something.  And I personally think it adds a lot of stress to our already stressful lives to know if we have a predisposition to a certain disease or ailment.  I think it's better to do the things you know you're supposed to do to keep healthy as long as you can.  You know, eat right, exercise, drink lots of water, don't smoke, that kind of thing. Why open up Pandora's Box?

Plus, I don't imagine that insurance companies are going to cover this sort of testing, nor will they foot the bill for a preventative procedure.  They don't do much, if any, of that now.  So, who gets to do this type of thing?  You guessed it, the people that have the money to do so.  The uninsured and the poor peeps just have to live and die with the genetic cards they've been dealt.

So what do you think of genetic testing?  Do you think it's somewhat frivolous to opt for a double mastectomy when cancer isn't present?  I'd love to hear your thoughts.