Monday Mourning: The Death of a Mother
Today on the blog, I have Jaimie Hutchison. Jaimie is a licensed funeral director and the manager of marketing for the Hutchison Funeral Home. He graduated from Mortuary Science Program at Wayne State University in 2003. Jaimie’s goal is to provide personal service during funerals and maintain the honor of the deceased.
DW: Who was the person that died?
JH: My Mother.
DW: How old were you at the time?
JH: 34
DW: How old was she?
JH: My mother never told her age.
DW: Was it a sudden death or did you know it was going to happen?
JH: Very sudden.
DW: Did you and your mom ever talk about death?
JH: I never brought it up to her. She had her way of telling me she wouldn’t always be around. But we never had an open conversation about her death.
DW: Had you experienced any other deaths in your personal life before your mom died?
JH: My grandmother. I was in high school when she died (almost 20 years ago).
DW: Were people supportive of your grief or did they shy away from you when you were grieving?
JH: People were supportive. It was a very awkward time for my wife and I though.
DW: Is there anything you wish you’d done differently with your mom?
JH: Not a thing. That was something that I thought about a lot after her passing. I wouldn’t change anything. I loved my mother very much and she knew it.
DW: Was she buried or cremated?
JH: Buried
DW: Did you learn anything about the grieving process you’d like to share?
JH: A lot. Much more than what I was taught in Mortuary school. Specifically the point I want to share is that everyone grieves differently. There is not a wrong way for an individual to grieve. For me, I have dealt with death and funerals for my entire life. So I made a conscious effort to be in the moment and mourn in real time.
DW: Were any songs played at the memorial service that were important to your mom?
JH: Yes. My mother loved God very much and she loved to listen to gospel music. So one day my mother and I were sitting in the family room listening to the radio. The song “Don’t cry” by CeCe Winans came on. She told me very plainly, when I'm gone don’t cry for me, because I will be in a better place. I remembered that conversation very clearly and added that song to the funeral service.
Thank you Jaimie for contributing to my blog! I have one last question and you can post it in the response area below. Were you working in the funeral industry when your mother died? If so, did you prepare her body for burial?